My name is Tifany and I make art and music for discriminating ears, eyes, and minds.
I am currently have several projects, all in different stages of development – the album Southern Gothic, the family band project, a play set in space.
And one I am very excited about: my first book. A non-fiction work describing the incredible transformation I experienced when I kicked the makeup habit.
I want to help women claim their own beauty and confidence that comes with aligning body, mind, and spirit.
Yes, my journey included taking off my makeup, but it was more about being true to myself and incorporating all of the elements I have learned in a lifetime in the performing arts and applying them to my life.
Join me on my continuing journey and I will share my secrets so that you too can incorporate art into your life and enjoy those exalted qualities that are the byproducts of art.
Tony Robbins is my guru lately. I am fascinated with harnessing emotions to focus energy and change your life. The subject took hold of my head after I managed to change my world by changing my perspective on what was happening, literally I just changed how I felt and everything changed. I began asking myself empowering questions that built me up instead of dragging me down. The topic is also Robbins’ obsession and he has done A LOT of study on the subject—his entire career.
Use his Power Questions to start your day off and ignite your passion and purpose.
What am I happy about in my life now?What about that makes me happy? How does that make me feel? If you’re not so happy right now, then what *could* make you happy? How would that make you feel?
What am I excited about in my life now?What about that makes me excited? How does that make me feel? If you’re not so excited about anything in your life right now, what *could* make you excited? How would that make you feel?
What am I proud about in my life now?What about that makes me proud? How does that make me feel? If you’re not so proud about anything in your life right now, what *could* make you proud? How would that make you feel?
What am I grateful about in my life now? What about that makes me grateful? How does that make me feel? If you’re not so grateful about anything in your life right now, what *could* make you grateful? How would that make you feel?
What am I enjoying in my life right now?What about that do I enjoy? How does that make me feel? If you’re not enjoying anything in your life right now, what *could* you enjoy? How would that make you feel?
What am I committed to in my life right now?What about that makes me committed? How does that make me feel? If you’re not so committed to anything in your life right now, what *could* you be committed to? How would that make you feel?
Who do I love? Who loves me?
Starting off your day by focusing on positives invigorates and channels your energy. Similarly, end your day with power.
The Evening Power Questions:
What have I been given today? In what ways have I been a giver?
What did I learn today?
How has today added to the quality of my life or how can I use today as an investment in my future?
In an age of globalization where most of us have access to an infinite amount of information, resources and opportunities, it’s inevitable to feel at times like our existence is trivial in life.
On the contrary, it’s us, both our individuality and collectiveness, that allows these things to be created, shared and accessible to everyone.
Ideas are floating around, being expressed and exposed more than ever. Innovation, knowledge and products are being born every day. What used to be left to the geniuses like Newton and Da Vinci, is now possible and available to all of us.
I’m sure there were many geniuses in the past, but the access to information and the platform for exposing it and distribute it didn’t exist before. Today all has changed because of the Internet.
We can name so many innovators and influencers from the top of our heads. From technology masters like Mark Zuckerberg to media empires like Oprah Winfrey and life teachers like Tony Robbins. YouTube celebrities, online entrepreneurs and bloggers are also on the list making a difference in our lives. Even people like you and me are expressing opinions, inspiring and creating change all the time.
Confidence Is All You Need
Today we all can be the Isaac Newton of our time. The only thing separating us from him is our faith in ourselves.
Do you think Newton knew exactly where to start? Did he have a rock-solid plan? Was he struck by lighting or catapulted by luck?
My guess is no. The only thing he knew – just like the rest of the innovators and influencers we admire – was that he wanted to be it. He had a dream and he started doing whatever he thought had to be done to accomplish it.
Along the way, I’m sure he doubted himself, he probably laughed and cried too, he felt on top of the world one day and under the ground the next, but no matter what, he kept on going.
All these leaders actually keep on going today. Life doesn’t stop and challenges don’t disappear as you advance and achieve success (except for the ones no longer here of course!).
We all go through life every day and we have to make decisions. We decide to believe – or not – in ourselves and our goals and keep on going.
Today Is the Day to Start Working on Your Dreams
Today there are endless platforms to choose from and grow. The possibilities to develop a tribe and display our talents is easier and cheaper than ever. Grab a computer and connect to the Internet and the world is your oyster.
All you need to start is a dream and what you need to keep going is confidence.
Don’t focus on adversity, focus on possibility. Don’t ask for permission, make a decision. Don’t put limits on yourself, let it flow.
Will it be scary? Yes.
Will you have all the answers? No.
Will it be worth it? You betcha!
If you have a dream, there is a reason why you do. Will you act upon it?
There wasn’t an iPod before the iPod.
There wasn’t a Kleenex before Kleenex.
There wasn’t an Internet before the Internet.
And if your dream has a before, then there will always be an after. You are unique and your product or service, your approach, your positioning will always be different and will always have an audience.
There are more than 7 billion people in the world. I can guarantee you, your dream has a place in the market.
Using Confidence To Accomplish Your Dreams
It’s not the money nor the knowledge or the influence – which all help – but the confidence to get it done. The single tool that will take you to wherever you want to go is confidence. The thing you need to work on as you keep dreaming, visualizing, studying, creating and sharing, is your confidence.
I wrote a Confidence Manifesto to remind myself that everything I need is already within me. I read it almost every Monday and whenever I need an extra confidence boost. You can read it every morning if you like!
I want my confidence to come from within and not from outside. Don’t rely on the external, rely on the internal. Use the external as icing on a cake (the extra good stuff!).
Don’t assign the people around you the duty of growing and developing your confidence. Have a system in place that works.
Whenever I read the Confidence Manifesto, I feel immediately aligned. I recognize that my emotions or circumstances are trying to deviate me from my path, but I have the power to get back on track.
After I read the 10 affirmations that unveil the truth about who I am and who I can be, I feel unstoppable and there is no room for doubt.
The questions at the end of the manifesto help me focus on my goals and identify the next step I need to take to make it happen.
The Confidence Manifesto
The Confidence Manifesto is composed of 10 affirmations for a more confident you. Read this manifesto out loud every day, every beginning of the week or when you need to.
When you are scared to start a project, read the manifesto. When you feel like you can’t keep going, read the manifesto. When you have made a mistake and feel like giving up, read the manifesto. When you have lost faith in what you are doing, read the manifesto.
Don’t let emotions or circumstances cloud your judgement and deflate your confidence.
Start developing your confidence today and create the kind of life you want. Create a routine to build up your confidence. Do things that help you increase it. Have a system for when you need a confidence boost.
Recognize that when you have a goal or a dream, the only thing stopping you from achieving it is you. Do what it takes to build up your confidence and things will start falling into place.
Preparations for Valentine’s day begin in our head this week as we fill up our hearts in preparation for the big day. Whether you have a dearly beloved or not, let’s develop a happy skip in our step as we bound our way towards the big day. Of course spouses will benefit from increased amounts of happiness and love, and a large dose of self-love for singles comes just in time to brace for the sometimes dreaded day of being reminded of happy couples.
This is the challenge: take 5 minutes for the next 5 days and imbue your thoughts with one of the five qualities listed in this week’s life design worksheet: gratitude. forgiveness, synchronicities, love, and adoration. Record any observations throughout the day. I would love to hear about any thought and/or mood changes, epiphanies, and miracles that occur! Hit reply or connect with us on our new facebook page.
Here is my epiphany from the exercise—I am experiencing some family issues (thanks, election!) and have been dwelling in anger and hurt, my thoughts circling over and over actions and words passed between close family members. I consciously reached for grateful thoughts when I would notice my thought pattern begin to obsess. It was a reach to find gratitude, and I definitely noticed my thoughts reach a crescendo when the gratitude finally broke through and cleaned my mind of these obsessive thought patterns that have been dogging me for months now. There is a lot to unpack within this one scenario and I will have lots to study, but in the meantime, my heart and mind is blissfully clear.
I am not a perfect student—one reason I like acting more as a facilitator than teacher—and I confess that I was riding so high from the first day of gratitude that I didn’t have a lot of negativity going on to counteract for the remainder of the challenge. Let’s hope that you get as much out of gratitude as I did/do, but you never know where your revelation lies.
Remember: if you find yourself throughout the day coming back to thoughts that do not serve, fill them with the quality of the day. Know that your thoughts may try and take a stronghold when they feel threatened. It is always darkest…before the epiphany.
I am curious: what quality of emotion will be your transformation?
Fear and Faith. Both are beliefs held about events that have not yet happened. Both are oriented in the future.
Fear is an important feeling that alerts us to potential problems. My goal is not to eliminate fear from my emotional repertoire as I believe that all emotions are important in the range of human experience. Instead my goal is to utilize the energy contained within the emotion and transmute that into positivity.
We need all emotions at varying times throughout our life—the “good” and the “bad” ones, strong feelings and milder ones. Imagine a world where sadness did not exist and loss was never experience: Isn’t grief the evidence of strong love? All of our emotions are tied together and important to our experience.
Fear is important to be experienced to understand our frailty as human beings—we feel this and we do not take unnecessary risk. But what about when fear is ingrained so that it becomes a block to living our life to the fullest? Perhaps we obsessively transfix on small details, holding us back from making bigger strides towards loftier goals.
A lot of unnecessary fear stems from culturally ingrained problems—we allow our appearance, lack of resources, or insecurity to hold us back from taking risks that could enrich our life because of a perceived notion that we are not good enough. In reality, none of these things matter, a fact that has been proven again and again by people who have proved the world wrong and achieved greatly from unexpected and unprecedented places. I have come to the conclusion that if the world says to do something, that is information that can be thrown away without hesitation.
And where Fear is the paralysis of movement or a fleeing from that which is fearful, Faith is the overwhelming belief that our desired result will materialize, regardless of the circumstances that surround us. Faith provides comfort in present circumstances and an easiness in moving forward. In fact, the most faithful among us look like crazed lunatics as they fiercely hold onto faith in the face of traumatic surroundings, regardless of the faith to which they espouse.
I have often heard it said that Faith is fantastical thinking, and—right before death—the faithful realize that the life they have lived is a lie. I don’t know about you, but this sounds a lot like the mental tape of someone who is firmly attached to doubt. How would they know what happens, or if it happens at all?
I have decided that a lifetime of faith feels better whether or not I ever achieve that which I pray faithfully for—whether it is to live an eternity in heaven or to hold faithfully to my dreams, whatever they may be. Doesn’t this feel better than a lifetime of fear and doubt? What does the person achieve who never believed at the end of their life? The egotistical self-satisfaction of being right?
Faith feels better.
And the truth is that the faithful are blessed with crazy, ridiculous miracles. Yes, miracles! Miracles happen to the faithful and I have seen it so many times in my own life, in the lives of my family and friends, and over and over in the lives of people who are students of their thoughts.
The problem is: how do we get from the one side to the other? How do we go from living our life in fear to living our life in faith?
We traverse the bridge that takes us from fear to faith. Called The Bridge of Faith, it is a spiritual journey takes us from one landscape to a drastically different one emotionally. How do you cross that bridge?
It can happen right now. In this moment. By being present and deciding that it is so. Then Faith rains down its blessings from Heaven like the water drops on the face in a storm.
For every fear, replace with faith. Make a list. The voice speaks for the body (this is why you have to say affirmations out loud), the image of faith you hold in your mind, the mood you choose to cling to for your emotion, and a public statement for your spirit—perhaps words of kindness in one of your relationships. Use the entire arsenal that is at your disposal. In fact, combining techniques is the most effective to feel faith and subsequently work across layers of existence.
The paralysis of fear not only grips our mind, but it greatly affects our relationships. In fact, all of our emotions are woven together with each other, interconnected in the tapestries of our family, networks, and larger world.
An example: I swear my daughter can read my mind sometimes. This baffled me at first when she was first born. I might have been scared but not for the naturalness that comes with the mama and baby relationship. But there is no reason to contemplate fear for the explanation is simple: she reads my emotions which are tied to my thoughts.
Do thoughts trigger emotion? Or does the emotion precipitate the thought?
This is the revelation: as we do not exist in a vacuum, neither do our thoughts. Our energy is echoing out across dimensions in fractal waves. We can channel this energy at any time for our better intentions. Our higher purpose. The bigger dream.
It takes practice to move from living largely in a fearful or doubting mindset to believing that you can achieve your wildest dreams. The change must be replicated across the layers of existence.
Dream wildly: the bigger the dream, the farther you have to reach, the higher you can climb. So don’t practice on little stuff—I mean, practice always—but reach out of your comfort zone and dream big as the the bigger the dream, the more miraculous the outcome, the farther we reach out of our mundanity. The bigger we dream, the easier it becomes to believe in the miraculous.
To delve into the topic with more depth, I am excited to share an upcoming opportunity to join our FREE webinar workshop, Vision Book, A Life Design Workshop. This workshop will use this worksheet or your favorite pen and paper. So much of manifestation study is centered around the self. I have found that it is our relationships and networks that contain our real magic and power. We are going to be strengthening these manifestation muscles in the workshop, so bring an intention or goal and join us. Message me or visit the registration page here. (Workshop is also safe for introverts.)
poll: What do you want to see next week?
Transmute Anger to Joy
Movie Night : Through Oz to Lift-Off
Kindness as Beauty
Comment your choice below. Winner chosen in random drawing wins workshop bundle of choice.
“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things.” ~ Philippians 4:8
USING EMOTION AS A SIGNPOST FOR THOUGHT.
Emotion points the direction of our thoughts, and while there may be endless alternate realities that we reject when we choose our direction in each moment by choosing our thought and emotion, I always see two paths only: the path filled with lightness, and a path shrouded by darkness.
On one path, our thoughts are expansive, emotion is buoyant, and hope, trust, and serendipity exist. The other path is rife with negative thoughts that reinforce not good enough beliefs and strengthen helpless emotions. One scenario presents purpose, the other, we are the victims of the universe. In one mindset, we see beauty; the other, pain. One path is grateful no matter the circumstances. The other path is pitiful and small, shallow, and jealous even in abundant circumstances.
Our choice is clear — so why would we ever choose anything but our righteous path?
If we do not believe that choice is an option, we can become trapped in a negative spiral with only brief moments of respite. Perhaps a friend can lift our mood, or maybe we are inspired by a story that lifts us momentarily. We then depend on externals for our happiness making those we depend on heavier for carrying our emotional weight.
Better to choose happiness. We choose by our thoughts. Change your mood by changing the thoughts that fuel our emotions.
USING THOUGHTS AS A PROPELLER FOR DREAMS AND GOALS.
Change your thoughts and change your life.
This week’s mental adventure incorporates the tool of bibliomancy.
“Bibliomancy is the use of books in divination. The method of employing sacred books (especially specific words and verses) for ‘magical medicine’, for removing negative entities, or for divination is widespread in many religions of the world.”
I use Angel Cards, but any method will work. For me, the simplicity of meditating on one delightful word each day warms my heart with a peace that eludes me when using other oracle methods (tarot, runes, dice). I love playing all games spiritual, but there is safety in an angel card deck — you will never stumble upon the Devil card when looking to the Heavens for divine direction. I understand the importance of the shadow side of the deck, and I am the first to plunge into the darker waters of self-reflection, but an angel deck provides me with a particularly angelic-type experience.
This is one of the reasons why I love the Angel Cards so much: I can focus my feelings without fear. I take the power they store up and transmute it into something physical. I pick the card Glory, for instance, and my heart lifts from the heaviness I had moments before felt in my chest. My thoughts are raised to higher vibrations that can transform heavier emotions and lift them.
I also have seen divine guidance at work. Whatever daily word I choose often pops up serendipitously and leads me by divine direction. I know that I am on the right path when my destiny is revealed in small, earthly moments. So whether or not you believe in angels or your own incredible higher power buried in your subconscious mind, the ability to focus your attention up instead of down is powerful indeed.
The Angel Messages Life Design worksheet
Pick an Angel Card prompt as the starting point for divine guidance. If you do not have a deck handy, grab a book and randomly point to a page for your message from the angels. The point is not to get caught up in the physical particulars but to hone the mind for life design.
Place your chosen card or write in your word in the Angel message frame, then note throughout the day when this word or concept arises. Reveal underlying assumptions, find connections.
This exercise is powerful for revealing alternate forms of communication with our divinity. Stretches the prayer, visualization, and meditation muscles.
EMOTIONS CORRECT INAUTHENTIC VISUALIZATIONS.
Working with emotion can be an especially efficient manifestation technique.
We believe that we want something—a car, a lifestyle, notoriety—because we see other people wanting it first. Disentangling ourselves from our cultural surroundings can be difficult—unless we allow ourselves to rely on our emotions. And that means all of them: even the hard ones. Like diving into shadow work for intense self-reflection, mining our the more difficult aspects of our emotional landscape pay spiritual dividends quickly. Not facing hard truths does not remove them as obstacles on the path to your destination.
My most expansive moments have come quickly on the heels of hard realizations that the dreams I have struggled to attain haven’t been my dreams at all. My false dreams have belonged to family members, friends, or larger cultural fads.
We fight the feeling of our emotions telling us that we are on the wrong path, instead of embracing our feelings as signposts on our journey.
Join us next week for a little dose of wading in the deeper waters of shadow work as we identify that which to let go in our lives. But don’t worry: we will make it fun by including those dreams that give us delicious feelings and point the direction of our hearts.
Facebook. Eating patterns. Routes of travel. Thought patterns.
I find thought patterns to be at the base of all successful transformations. It is when I can find the thought pattern that I hold the key to the habit—whatever the habit might be. The state of mindlessness defines habits. When we have the power to unlock the habit, we are free to edit or delete it as we wish.
One of my most successful habit transformations directly resulted in editing a recurring thought pattern.
I hated, HATED cleaning and tidying the house. I hated the mundanity of it. The feminist in me protested that it should even be my job in the first place (even though I have lived alone a significant portion of my life when, yeah, it was my sole responsibility to clean my house or not). I resented that I hadn’t made the money to have someone else clean my house.
I thought about these things A LOT.
I would sit around and not clean the house while thinking about how much I hate cleaning the house. I didn’t make messes so that I wouldn’t have to clean. How do you not make messes? Limit life experience, that’s how. I would clean in the occasional and excruciating sprint/marathon cleaning event to prepare for impending guests and it would always feel like I had just cleaned the tip of the iceberg. The entirety of the mess lay beneath and the house only looked clean. Underneath, my household systems were a mess and a large part of my household frustration was my inability to deal with my problems.
In fact, I thought about cleaning so much so that when I finally did start cleaning with regularity, I noticed that I thought about cleaning less. A lot less. It turns out that I didn’t hate cleaning. I hated thinking about cleaning. Convenient that cleaning is a habit—a beautiful, orderly, mindless habit.
But how did I bridge this gap between the old self and my old habits/thought patterns and the self that I aspired to be? How did I drive from the one place to the other?
My prayer was a last ditch effort, though I had prayed before for a clean house many times. Of course, prayer came after feng shui-ing my home. After I had meditated, affirmed for decades, visualized. I had visions of making a million bucks so I could hire a maid, the substance of these visions never materializing. It became obvious to me despite all of the believing and work that I had put into miraculously creating a transformation that there was, seemingly, no way around cleaning if I wanted a clean house.
So finally I asked for the desire to clean.
“Please God, make me want to clean.”
And it worked.
As simple as that, and in that moment too. Because when I asked, in that way, I realized that the problem was never about money or my relationships with other members in my household or the relationship of my gender to the world. The problem was in my heart: this deep resistance to taking responsibility for my environment, accompanied by fantastical notions—that could all happen, I believe this—but used as the excuse for my lack of responsibility.
Once this epiphany occurred, and boy, it was a big one, the house fell into order quickly with my dedicated efforts. A large once-over centered mainly around the organization and culling of Stuff that, it turns out, got in the way of cleaning in the largest way. And then a regular daily habit (and I do mean everyday) of floors, counters, laundry, clutter, and daily chore. The house became immaculate. And ordered. And a pleasure in which to spend time. And a safe haven for my new daughter that necessitated my Hail Mary prayer.
It turns out that I love order. And beauty. Something I would have never realized had I continued fighting myself.
This is how thoughts can get away from us and control our lives. And while I am the biggest proponent of designing your most magical life, I have seen a fantasy used too many times to replace real life. Kinda like the difference between habit and engagement, there is the state of fantastical thinking and dreaming that can never hold a candle to the deep reservoir of feeling that is living within your life’s purpose.
I made a diagram of the process I embraced to make change. I couldn’t fit it onto one sheet of paper so this journal prompt is three pages long. College ruled. Sorry, for those of you who freeze up at the expanse of paper before you. A big fat you-are-welcome to those who think one page isn’t time enough.
The journey this exercise follows asks for larger and larger increments of divulging what is in your heart. I had to add the synchronicities section and an idea graph as the revelations I received from the connections of the short form page necessitated the addition.
I can’t wait to hear about your epiphanies.
~~ Tifany ~~
Leave a comment or join our Society on Facebook. We would love to connect with you and share your epiphanies in your inspired life design.
Bonus thought experiment:
Decide if you could use your social media connections to specifically change a situation or event in your life. Think harder if all you can come up with is spread love, man. You don’t have to instigate this change or act on it in any way if you so choose. Just to imagine a larger network of help and reward. This is a ridiculous dream assignment.
Next week: The Un-brainwashing.
I have dedicated my life to using my powers for good. I invite you next week to consider a life that doesn’t include what you do not want. I have the secret.
It’s a Wonderful Life.
Speaking of movies, our resident fictional character and film critic, Heroine Taylor, will be arriving to discuss the merits of this film with us and the implications we can utilize in designing beautiful, lovely well-designed lives. She’s a firecracker, that Heroine…Can’t wait to hear what she is on to…
Used to understand complicated systems like plumbing and alien technology, reverse engineering is the process of working backwards to solve problems.
It is flawlessly used in this week’s free printable for narrowing focus when inspiration and energy wanes.
Habits are powerful tools, capable of being used for good and evil both. I have recently revolutionized my household with the implementation of habits that have turned my previously chaotic environment into a peacefully ordered home.
Simple, effective habits.
Except for when habits are used for evil and then they are pernicious destroyers of our efficiency, productivity, and goals and dreams.
Is evil too strong a word? I think not.
Would a thief who sneaks into your most precious dream and chips away at it slowly every day not be considered evil? He certainly is not good.
And the thief I am talking about is Facebook. Or Twitter, or video games, or cigarettes, or whatever your poison of choice. I have done all of the above, I am ashamed to say. They all seem innocuous enough when we “just take a minute” to check the twittersphere, when in reality bad habits are a form of procrastination of some form or fashion.
We are resistant, insecure, or lack confidence to move ahead towards wild dreams.
I am not saying we should quit social media altogether or shun fun. The problem arises when we replace engagement with habit. Engagement is being present in the moment. Habit does not require engagement – this is exactly why habit is so powerfully used to systematize processes because it runs without thought. But it is exactly for this reason that habit can become dangerous when we have systematized a process no longer necessary but we are still performing it thoughtlessly.
This is one reason I love the regular check-in that is journaling (or recording or meditating or however it is performed). A thoughtful approach to our lives pays back dividends far beyond the time we put into these self reflective moments.
We could save the time and forever spin our wheels down the wrong road. I personally love plotting my course.
Next week, I can’t wait to share with you my passion for quitting stuff. Learning to love change has so dramatically changed my life that change is my new habit… Something that has served me well in the process of dream attainment. But that, as they say, is a story for another day…